My house should look a certain way
The Gist:
+Real life is messy. Let it be messy. Just for now.
+Make a neat, kid-free space for yourself (even a tiny one!).
The Longer Version:
I really struggle sometimes with the way my house looks. There are days when it looks like a college dorm, and I feel like it’ll never be clean or tidy again. When the kids have tracked in mud (or those damn turf pellets in their soccer shoes). When my husband has left a week’s worth of reading in a pile on the kitchen counter.
There are some days when my house looks really nice. Usually right before a party. When I’ve declared a “Family Clean Up Time!”
This is when we set a timer for 15-30 minutes, and everyone puts their stuff away. In the actual place where it’s supposed to go. It ends up being WAY more fun than anyone thinks it will be.
Or maybe that’s just me.
It happens maybe 4 times per year.
But mostly there are signs of life all over the place: shoes, backpacks, jackets, art projects, treasures, dirty dishes, legos, blocks, dirty socks, etc.
Most days there are crumbs on the counter, laundry to be folded, and a stack of mail waiting to be opened.
Can you relate?
Do you have this feeling too?
Of being overwhelmed by The Mess?
Do you push against it like I do? By constantly tidying something?
By constantly wiping down surfaces and feeling like it’s a never ending task?
In the age of Instagram and HGTV, it might be harder than ever to live an actual life in an actual house with actual children.
Children make a mess.
Children don’t always (ever?) clean up their toys.
Children like to use A LOT of materials.
Children move around constantly.
And they should.
They are learning about the world and how it works. And when you’re learning about the world, you need to manipulate it - move it around, drop it a few times, pick it up, mouth it, throw it, pick it up again.
And roll it under the couch.
Exploration does not lend itself to tidiness or things being in their place.
Exploration is about mess, chaos, disorder and trial and error.
But, here’s the thing (and you already know this): looking at a mess all the time can be frustrating.
Feeling like the house will never be tidy (or clean) again can be aggravating.
You might need a little space for yourself that is kid-free and organized.
Even if it’s one single drawer. One corner of the counter. One vase of flowers to look at.
Or maybe it’s your whole bedroom or home office (!! I wish!)
How ever big or small, create a space just for you if that helps keep the mental and physical clutter at bay.
And, definitely, watch HGTV for a fix every so often.
But don’t worry too much about the state of your actual living space.
You’ll get there.
Eventually.
Just not right now.
Not today.
It’s ok.
All my (messiest) best -
Gabriele